Jira to solve all world problems

While attending a tech conference a friend and I found the path to fixing all the worlds issues. Our problem is not that the issues are overly complex, or that base cultural and philosophical differences make some issue almost unsolvable (or at least require generations to change). The core reason we have been unable to solve the many genocides, hunger issues, terrorism, etc. is that we have not been tracking them appropriately.

If we could just get them all in Jira and prioritize them I am sure we can lick all of the stuff. In fact if we apply some agile thoughts and iterate quickly I am sure we will see some forward progress quickly and the citizens of the world will be better able to give us feedback on our progress\direction.